# Groom Speech: Structure, Thank-Yous and a Fill-In Template > Plan a five-minute groom speech in the traditional order: whom to thank, what to say about your new wife or husband, which toast to end on, plus a template. Source: https://hidengpt.com/write/groom-speech # I'm the groom, and I have to stand up after her dad and thank everyone. Bring the names you must thank, one story about your partner and how long you have. HidenGPT's Speech format, set to Wedding speech, turns 5 minutes into about 650 words in the order guests expect: thanks, your partner, a toast. It works from your names and stories and leaves a gap rather than inventing one. Updated October 15, 2026 · by the HidenGPT team Try it with your own details Enter to send · Shift+Enter for a new line ## How to do it in HidenGPT - 01 Ask who speaks before and after you, so you know whether you are replying to her father's speech, welcoming the room yourself, or both. - 02 List every person you need to thank, spelled the way they say their names, and decide which toast you will end on. - 03 With Speech picked under “Use it for”, set Occasion to Wedding speech, Minutes to 5 and Your role to “the groom, speaking after the father of the bride”, then type your thank-yous and one story about your partner and send. - 04 Check each name against your list, delete anything that did not happen, fill every [add a short memory] gap and change any phrase you would not say to your friends. - 05 Rehearse it with a timer at least three times, and once with your best man so your material does not overlap. [Speech & Toast](https://hidengpt.com/tools/speech): Weddings, graduations, keynotes: timed to the minute and written to be read aloud. ## The traditional groom speech structure In the British order Debrett's describes, the father of the bride speaks first, the groom second and the best man last. The groom's part is mostly thanks. Debrett's lists them in this order: first thank the father of the bride for his speech, on behalf of yourself and your new wife (the first time you say “my wife” usually gets a cheer), then thank the guests, the bride's parents if they hosted, your own parents and your best man. After that you may say a few words about your partner, and you traditionally end with a toast to the bridesmaids, though Debrett's notes that this is becoming less common and another toast is fine. Orders change. If you speak first, you also do the welcome, and her father can skip it. If the couple speaks together, split the thanks between you. Whatever the order, agree it with the other speakers so nobody thanks the same people twice and nobody proposes the same toast twice. Adrian Simpson, a UK wedding speechwriter, suggests no more than four toasts across all the speeches. American weddings are looser: the groom often gives a short thank-you and a toast to his partner, or speaks at the rehearsal dinner instead. The same parts work at any length. ## Fill-in-the-blanks template, and how to spend five minutes Use this for the order, then write your own sentences into it. 1. Reply and thanks to the first speaker, 40 words: “Thank you, [name], for those kind words. On behalf of my wife and me...” 2. Thank the guests, 50 words, including anyone who traveled far or could not come: “[number] of you came from [place], and we know what that took.” 3. Thank both families, 120 words: her parents for [what they did], your parents for [one specific thing]. 4. Thank the wedding party, 70 words: your best man by name, the bridesmaids by name, with one line each. 5. Your partner, 280 words: one story, then what you love about them, then a sentence spoken to them directly. 6. The toast, 40 words: to the bridesmaids, to absent friends or to your partner. That adds up to about 600 words, or a bit under five minutes at 130 words a minute, leaving room for laughs and applause. Most grooms overspend on thanks. If the list is long, thank groups (“everyone from the cricket club”) and save names for the people who did the most. ## Example: the part about your partner Example (the partner section, about 145 words, from the notes in the box above): “Now, Aisha. Some of you know we met at a pub quiz. What you may not know is that it was the bridges round, and her team beat mine by one point on a question about the Forth Bridge. I said the answer was obviously wrong. It was not. She has mentioned this once a month for four years, and I expect to hear about it at our fortieth anniversary. That is Aisha. She is right more often than is comfortable, and she is generous enough to make you laugh about it. Aisha, you made today feel easy, and I know how much work it took to make it look that way. I am proud to be your husband, and I will never argue about bridges with you again. That is my first promise as a married man, and probably the hardest one.” That section runs a little over a minute. Before it, the thanks; after it, the toast. ## What the Speech format does for a groom With Occasion on Wedding speech, the draft introduces you and your connection in the first lines, works your notes in, leaves out exes, money, fights and crude jokes, and ends with a raised glass. Tell it in the notes which toast you want; it ends the way you ask. Minutes runs from 1 to 15; at 5 it aims for about 650 words and warns you if the result is more than 30% off. It does not know your guest list, so it can only thank the people you name. Type them exactly. It is told not to invent stories, names or events, and leaves [add a short memory] in place of anything missing. Switch on Stage cues under More details for [pause] and [raise your glass]; they are left out of the word count. On Pro or Pro Max, a saved voice built from your own writing (300 characters minimum, two to five pieces works best) brings the wording closer to the way you talk, which matters most in the part about your partner. ## Not the right tool if - Your vows. The ceremony words go to your partner directly and end on a promise, not a toast; that is a different text. - The best man's job. Stag do stories and teasing belong to his speech, and the wedding setting keeps them out of yours. - A guest list it has not seen. It thanks only the people you name, so missing names stay missing. ## Other ways to do it The template above, written by hand Costs nothing and keeps every word yours. Slower if you rarely write, and the thanks section is easy to overload. A joint speech with your partner Common now. You split the thanks, each say one thing about the other, and the room hears one speech instead of two. A professional wedding speechwriter Interviews you and writes something polished, if you have the budget and a few weeks. ChatGPT or another chatbot Quick to get structure from, but it tends to add stock lines and details you never gave, which you then have to take out. ## Questions ### What is the structure of a groom speech? Thanks first, then your partner, then a toast. In the traditional British order you thank the father of the bride for his speech, then the guests, both sets of parents and the wedding party, say a few words about your partner and end with a toast, traditionally to the bridesmaids. ### How long should a groom speech be? Four to six minutes is usual, with five a good target. At about 130 words a minute, five minutes is roughly 650 words; aim a little under to leave time for laughs. ### Who does the groom thank? The father of the bride for his speech, the guests, the bride's parents if they hosted, his own parents, the best man and the bridesmaids. Agree with the other speakers so the same people are not thanked twice. ### Does the groom still toast the bridesmaids? Traditionally yes, but Debrett's notes it is becoming less common and another toast may be preferred. Many grooms now toast their partner or absent family instead. ### How do I mention a parent who has died? In one or two plain sentences, at the point where you thank your family. Check the wording with your surviving parent first, then carry on with the next thank-you. ### Is it okay to use AI for my groom speech? Yes, if the stories and thanks are real. It drafts from the names and memories you type; you correct what is wrong, rewrite what does not sound like you and stand up and say it as your own. ### Can I try it without subscribing? Yes. The homepage allows 2 drafts a day without an account. Writing in the studio, with history and your own voices, needs a plan; Pro's first month costs $3. ## Related - [My daughter is getting married, and I have to give the father of the bride speech.](https://hidengpt.com/write/father-of-the-bride-speech) - [I'm the best man at my brother's wedding, and I have three minutes.](https://hidengpt.com/write/best-man-speech-for-brother) - [We're writing our own wedding vows, and mine are still a blank page.](https://hidengpt.com/write/wedding-vows) - [My best friend is getting married, and I'm giving a speech in front of people I've never met.](https://hidengpt.com/write/wedding-speech-for-best-friend) - [We got married in September and we still owe 140 thank-you notes.](https://hidengpt.com/write/wedding-thank-you-notes) - [Does my writing sound like AI?](https://hidengpt.com/tools/ai-cliche-checker) - [Essays, homework and everyday writing that sounds like you](https://hidengpt.com/write) [Prefer HidenGPT on Google](https://www.google.com/preferences/source?q=hidengpt.com)